Method

Mentalising

Getting better at understanding what's going on in your own mind, and in other people's.

What is it?: Mentalising means making sense of the thoughts, feelings and intentions behind what we and others do. We all do it, but under stress it's easily lost: we jump to conclusions about what others mean, or can't make sense of our own reactions. Mentalisation-based therapy was developed by Anthony Bateman and Peter Fonagy.
How we work: We slow things down and explore what might have been going on, in you and in the other person, in situations that were hard. The aim is curiosity, not being right.
When it can help: It can help with strong, shifting emotions, with relationships that often end in conflict or hurt, and for parents who want to understand their child better.